Memoir Reflection

While I was reading Why Be Happy When You Could be Normal? I found it interesting how she discusses how memory can be both factual and fictional depending on how the events are perceived. She mentions how “writers frame their world” in that some people may not want to remember everything that has happened to them because it might be too traumatic to face those feelings again. It reminded me of what was mentioned in Of Memoir and Memory when negative memories can possibly be “distorted and manipulated” to make it more digestible to remember. I think that is why Winterson does not share all of the details she had with her mom because most of them are not pleasant to think about for her.

 

I also could personally relate to her when she talks about how “adopted children are self-invented because we have to be” and that the beginning of their lives is an unknown part of them. I was two years old when I was adopted from Ukraine by my parents. I have seen pictures and been told what I was like when my parents first met me, but obviously I have no memory as to what my life was like. The only childhood memories I have are happy ones with my parents and the rest of my family because to me that was all I was exposed to.

 

While I was reading Becoming, I really liked how during a memory she was able to recall her specific emotions and thoughts associated in the moment. For example, when she explained how she liked telling neighbors and family about her aspirations, that she subconsciously enjoyed receiving the approval from others, almost like a form of self-validation.  

 

I found this interesting because it reminds me of when adults ask little kids what they want to be when they grow up. I think subconsciously, we might say that we want to be a lawyer or a doctor because inherently we know that these are ambitious careers, but then also at the same we don’t fully understand what it means to become one either. I also found it relatable when she kept asking herself “am I good enough?” It's reassuring to hear successful and influential people like Michelle Obama has also gone through self-doubt just like everyone else.